Car Buying Soldiers, Listen Up!


FALL IN!

If you’re in the market for a car right now, listen up.  I have some information that could forever change the way you shop for a vehicle, and help you avoid the runaround at a dealership.  I’m talking about proven tactics designed to get you the consumer the most bang for your buck.  Or thrown in jail.  One or the other.

However, we need to handle a bit of administrative business first.

I’ve been throwing too many house parties lately, and things are starting to get a bit loosey-goosey.  So, I’ve decided that in order to regain some of the lost order, I’m bringing in a drill instructor for the rest of the week.  He will be answering all of your questions and comments if you have any.  Oh, and don’t eat anything greasy before you show up for basic training.

Meet your drill instructor for the week:

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman

 Drill Sergeant!

Take it away, Sarge.

Five StarsFive StarsFive StarsFive StarsMitch Sounds Off

Five StarsFive StarsFive StarsFive Stars Yes Drill Sergeant!

*****

Drop by this Thursday and check out Strategic Car Buying 101.

AND DON’T BE LATE.  THAT’S AN ORDER!

-Happy Blogging, Private First Class \m/

P.S.  Check out the Post of the Week by Society Red!

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69 comments

  1. H. Stern

    I don’t like yelling. Is there a part of basic training where we get to HUG the salesman until he gives me the car just based on my level of awesome? Because… yes. That.

  2. SocietyRed

    Adam,
    WHAT IS YOUR MAJOR MALFUNCTION NUMBNUTS! DIDN’T MOMMY AND DADDY SHOW YOU ENOUGH ATTENTION WHEN YOU WERE A CHILD?
    Adam you are too nice putting me up as the post of the week! Round two is coming up as soon as I finish up another project I’m working on. I promise it will be worthy and full of sexual over and undertones.
    Great post dude, who doesn’t hate fucking car salesmen!
    But my car is fine. And of course I have a pickup truck for backup…NUMBNUTS!
    Red

  3. Ad-libb3d

    I think I speak for the entire platoon when I say that when you tell us to move, we’ll move fast. When you tell us to jump, we’ll yell “How high?” When you tell us to torch the fuckin’ car dealership because they won’t throw in the floormats, we’ll say “We LOVE the smell of napalm in the mornin’!” HOO-AH!

    • Adam S

      YOU STRIKE ME AS A REAL SMART GUY! TELL ME, WHY IS THERE A NUMBER THREE IN YOUR NAME SON? IS THAT IN CASE SOMEONE HAS TO REORDER AN EXTRA ONE OF YOU’S?!

  4. sortaginger

    YES, DRILL SERGEANT, SIR! PERMISSION TO ASK A QUESTION, SIR! WELL, I’M ASKING ANYWAY!

    Is my kid correct that having him learn to drive in a car that looks like a toaster with a standard shift cruel and unusual punishment?

  5. talesfromthemotherland

    Well, now I’m 10 hrs late to the party, but as I said when I was first in line: I can’t stand car salesmen… and a close second are appliance sales. This is a riot Adam and I only wish I’d had some of these ideas when I bought my last car, or… my last oven. 😉 Very funny post. Both times.

    • Adam S

      WE CLEANED UP THAT TRASHY PARTY ATMOSPHERE AROUND HERE A LONG TIME AGO! NOW I DIDN’T COME ON BOARD TO PLAY MEDIATOR, BUT ADAM SAYS THANKS!

      NOW FALL IN LINE!

  6. Pingback: Strategic Car Buying 101 « MY RIGHT TO BITCH
  7. Runoffwriter

    Thanks for pointing to SocietyRed…funny as hell.
    Looking forward to catching up on what you’ve been griping about, Bitchmaster (give me a break, it’s my first go at nicknaming you…I’ll get better with practice…it’ll be like shopping online where you have the option to get a new card number for each purchase…I do not, however, offer a money back guarantee.)

    • Adam S

      I will give you a break this time. No money back necessary, even though I have very little at the moment.

      No problemo, by the way. Red’s awesome. He’s always got a good story. If you’re trolling his page, look for the one about his time spent at the sorority house. That one’s even better!

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