**Part One and Two can be found here: Chowderhead’s Official Sleep Deprivation Olympic Challenge. and here: Sleep Deprivation Olympic Challenge: Day 1 Results
Day 2 Recap: Fear and Loathing at the Local Laundromat
I spent the first few early morning hours at some dirty laundromat around the corner, glazed over, watching a pack of wild goobers meticulously folding their yellowed whites.
At one point, the Chowderhead at the front counter started to get lippy with me after I expressed my concerns over the excessive lint piles that, in my opinion, should be periodically swept from the folding tables.
I made a very dry remark about her missing front tooth after she refused to acknowledge my request, and the next thing I recall was a sort of white flash – like a computer rebooting – and myself on all fours, on the floor, staring at the tooth that had been forcefully removed from my head.
Luckily, for the sake of this experiment, I didn’t completely blackout.
After the lop-sided boxing match, I sat in the corner on a cheap collapsible chair, pouting, and watching the loads spinning simultaneously in front of their circular glass portholes. “Cheap panties and Levi’s,” I thought to myself. The slow, painful deterioration of my consciousness only accelerated from there…
Adjacent to me was a lice-infested brown sofa in the corner of the mat. The sloppy “love” seat was looking at me strangely, as if it had something important to tell me. It’s pillow pads began to distort and curl into a mouth-like shape.
And that’s when I realized I lost my mind.
Sofa: “She’s a fiesty one, ain’t she?”
Sofa: “So, was that your first time getting knocked out by a girl?”
Adam: “I didn’t get knocked out.”
Sofa: “Sure looked like it to me?”
Adam: “I said I didn’t get knocked out. And besides, it was a cheap shot.”
Sofa: “I know a guy who can put that (tooth) back in for you.”
Adam: “Is the guy you’re referencing a coffee table by chance?”
Sofa: “You know him?”
Adam: “Please stop talking to me right now. I have a headache.”
Sofa: “You should lay down.”
Sofa: “Are you always this cranky?”
Adam: “None of your business.”
Sofa: “Fair enough.”
Sofa: “Wanna hear a funny joke?”
Adam: “You know what, I can’t take this anymore. I’m leaving.” (Gets up)
Sofa: “Wait, it’s a really good one…”
I grabbed my load of towels and gave the Chowderhead a dirty look on my way out the door. I’ll be sending a dental bill very shortly…
Day 1: 19 hours
Day 2: 24 hours
43 hours without sleep.
Need. Aspirin. Now.
– Happy Blogging, Chowderheads
CLICK HERE for Day 3 Results
- Sleep Deprivation Olympic Challenge: Day 1 Results (thechowderhead.com)
- Chowderhead’s Official Sleep Deprivation Olympic Challenge (thechowderhead.com)