The Official Chowderhead Retirement Party

I’ve been putting a lot of thought into slippin’ out the back door unnoticed for awhile now, but the decent jerk in me feels like a sign off post would be the cool thing to do.

That sounds so self-important doesn’t it?  Like I’m sittin’ here selling off locks of hair because you deserve to have them.  This is some serious protocol shit here.  I’m sorry.  I know it’s corny.  You love it, don’t lie.

It’s not supposed to sound self important.  I’m just another peon hiding out in a very small corner of the internet like the rest of you peons.  That doesn’t change the fact that I feel like I’ve made some real friends over the past year-plus.  And despite how much it sucks for me to have to pull up the stakes on something that’s been so gratifying in so many ways – something that led to so many great memories and accomplishments – it’s just not fun to me anymore, and it hasn’t been for awhile.

But before I mosey on outta here I would like to talk about some serious stuff.

I read a lot of the posts the other day during the fallout, and I will say this about it:  I’m not here to attack, defend, justify, or debate any of it here, and I kindly ask that you keep it out of the comment section on this site.  In no way, shape, or form is that a criticism to any party involved, because I understand the severity of it.  It’s just a preference of mine to not be involved publicly.  Respect that.

Reading all of it was pretty overwhelming, and it scared the hell out of me – not just imaginary-blogging-bubble scared – real world scared.  It was an example of just how quickly information can spread on the Internet, and it raised a lot of questions in my mind about the blogging arena from a legal, ethical, and personal safety standpoint.

I’ve never felt comfortable putting personal information on the Internet.  In fact, I don’t even really like Facebook for that reason.  I don’t like the thought of having certain information of mine available to anybody with an Internet connection.  Although I do it on occasion, I usually end up regretting it.  Once it’s out there and read, it’s too late to call it back.

It reminds me of the adage:  “If all your friends jumped off a cliff, would you follow them?”

Like with everything, when everybody’s doing something it somehow creates this illusion that it’s safer, or more acceptable to do.  A lot of people, including myself, have posted some pretty juicy stuff online – particular things that profile us, or mistake us for professional opinions.

This platform allows us to freely communicate our opinions and views on topics with a very wide audience.  With that privilege, I think there should also be a certain amount of personal responsibility that comes along with it.

As far as the reality of this whole blogging platform goes, it’s an imaginary world – a fantasy – and sometimes it’s easy to get caught up in that fantasy aspect of it.  It all sounds so poetic – and by design – like images from a movie, meant to stir the emotions of the reader.  We look at the images of each other; we read the amazing words and stories pouring out of those pictures daily, and our minds naturally fill in the blanks.  Basically, we profile each other.

We begin to trust in the stories.  They appear to be consistent, and the images back them up.  We like the people that are being created in our mind’s eye.  The truth is, we never truly know the people that we’re communicating with online until we meet and learn about them in real life.  Even then, discovery doesn’t happen overnight.  It takes time to build a real life friendship.  Online, we’re just acquaintances.  And regardless of how many years we’ve been in contact with each other, we still don’t know each other.

It’s kinda like having an imaginary friend.

The reality is that people aren’t images and blog posts, and we consistently give our trust away to people that aren’t yet worthy of having it.  It takes time to build trust, and to discover whether or not the persona matches the person.

Here, we’re all characters.  Although the stories sound similar to our own experiences, it’s not reality.

I pulled my blog down a couple months go for that reason.  There were things on this site that profiled me personally that I decided weren’t appropriate to have online.  I keep my inner most thoughts and personal experiences now in a journal.  It’s my preference, but maybe you might want to consider it too.

I built my shtick around comedy.  It’s cathartic in a way, and I’ve always enjoyed interacting with everybody that pops in.  I’m gonna grind that to a hault for now however, and say thank you so FUCKING much for being so cool and supportive of what I do.  It’s something I’ve always enjoyed, and our interactions with each other have made it all that much better.

I’m gonna be writing at Long Awkward Pause from now on full-time, and I’d love to see all you guys around still.  If the mood strikes me to write here again in the future, I’ll definitely come back and rock it.  For now, I gotta bounce, yo.

And lastly, I’d love to have you guys share a story or something funny, or an interaction we had together, or something that you enjoyed about coming around here.  It would seriously make my day.  *Here’s a locket of hair in return*

Sooooo, with all that said, I think it would only be appropriate to end on this note:


When Suze Speaks You Will Listen

How anti-climactic…


  1. Vanessa-Jane Chapman

    Really good post, and a lot of truth in what you say. I think it’s nice that you’ve written this, it doesn’t sound self-important at all. We’ve all seen blogs and bloggers just disappear and we’re left wondering what happened to them, are they ok? So it’s good to know like this when it was a specific choice to stop. If it’s not fun anymore then indeed, why continue. I haven’t been a particularly regular or consistent visitor over here, but when I have, it’s always been a fun experience! Good luck to ya!

  2. Jolie Michele

    Yeah, I always imagined it’d be difficult to juggle two blogs. I think that’s why my blog is a shmorgis borg (if I spelled that right the first time, I am shocked and amazed, or my spell checker isn’t working…) of topics.

  3. speaker7

    I’m making the rock star salute as I type this, which is why this is taking so long to type. Very wise words. It does make one stop and think about what one puts out there. I enjoyed reading your blog and will check out Long Awkward Pause.

    • Chowderhead

      Speaker7, right back: \m/

      Can I tell you something in not confidence? I think you’re one of the funniest fucking people that I read. I also stole your caption bubble idea. So, thank you for that. I really appreciate you poppin’ in frequently too, and I’ll still be around to shoot the bull on occasion. LAP is gonna be pretty good pretty soon too, so do keep an eye out. We’ll chat. Later!

  4. NotAPunkRocker

    I will be sorry to see you go but glad you will still be around on LAP.

    *pours out a 40*

    Rock on my friend! \m/ (^_^) \m/

    • Chowderhead

      Fuck yeah! Don’t waste that beer though! Thank you SO much for all your comments and shit – I’m glad you stuck around. In the meantime, I know we’re following each other on Twitter, so let’s start up some funny Tweet Threads, eh? I’ll read when blogs when I can. I promise.

      Rock on, chick \m/

  5. denmother

    I obviously missed the fallout because I haven’t a clue what you’re talking about. However, the post of yours I’ve read have always been a good time. Glad to hear you’re carrying on. Cue air guitar…….

    • Chowderhead

      Hey cougar, wait, can I still say that? I know that’s an old tie we have, but I’m not sure if it’s worn out or not? I really appreciate that! They were a fucking hell of a lot of fun to write, I’ll say that. I’m glad that people found them funny too. Stop by LAP whenever you’re bored. There some funny stuff on there, and I’ll pop back in and out to read once in awhile.

      *Air drums!* \m/

      • denmother

        Cougar for life Chowder. Cougar for life. See you at the LAP where I shall spend some stalking time. Pretty much all you guys crack me up.

      • Chowderhead

        Now that makes me feel good. I agree. De Voss cracks me up – especially on his personal blog. For whatever reason, and I explained this to him already, so he knows, just in case he’s watching this right now, but I read him when I can’t sleep. I don’t know why, but every time – well, most of the time – I’m fucking laughing out loud. I don’t do that often!

        *special powers*

    • Chowderhead

      Thanks, chick! I know we just met recently, but you seem pretty cool. I appreciate the nod too! I’ll be around, and make sure to drop by over at LAP for a read!

      Salute! \m/

  6. julesagray

    I don’t get it. you’re a writer, yes? Then why not just write for yourself and ignore the drama?
    Why leave? That makes no sense to me. Show support for the community, stick around, rise above it and do your craft.
    Otherwise, WordPress is no better than high school.
    You gotta ignore the crap around you and just WRITE, you know, carry on. It’s what a writer does. I do this and as a result, I’ve helped launch a startup and I’m almost done with my book.
    Just my two cents.
    Good luck to you!

    • Chowderhead

      Hey, Jules.

      This is an amazingly effective publicity stunt! It’s working. Best traffic I think I ever had here, go figure…

      In all seriousness, I totally get what you’re saying and I don’t really plan on disappearing – I just don’t want to write here anymore. This thing fizzled out for me months ago. Also, I can’t give you a definitive number of posts, but I have enough material written right now that could probably carry me into summer. I write offline a lot because I enjoy writing. I’m also keeping the site up. I like it as a portfolio – I USE it as a portfolio, and a practice pad – those were the purposes that it ultimately served for me. The Chowderhead/My Right to Bitch thing was just a first step in my writing career path, and I’m fucking ECSTATIC of how well it worked, seriously. Way way better than I expected. I think when you’re starting off, you need good stuff to happen. You need to be validated, and you need a little bit of exposure – I got what I needed from it, and now I feel in some capacity like I have some credibility. Now I need to focus on something that will actually pay off.

      I haven’t heard anything yet, but Cracked requested a cover letter from me the other day. Fingers crossed. That’s what I want next. If it doesn’t happen now, it will happen eventually. That’s what I really want – it’s my goal right now as a comedy writer, and I think it’s attainable. We’ll see! I’ll keep you posted via email, or drop by your blog if it pans out to brag about it.

      I’ll still be by to read you, and feel free to pop by LAP. Same shit, different blog. Also, email.

      Later! \m/

      • julesagray

        good luck with Cracked. Sounds like a plan.

        It’s just interesting the timing of you saying buh-bye, considering what’s going on north of us. Couldn’t help but notice the aforementioned kerfuffle considering it’s a major shit sammich.


      • Chowderhead

        Thanks, Jules. Oh no, don’t get me wrong, that definitely plays into it, but it’s so much more than that. There’s so much stigma too – like stale air, almost – it’s like living in a house that somebody died in. Does that explain it? I dunno. My words escape me. Too much coffeeh..

  7. Twindaddy

    I don’t like your decision, but I respect it. This post is too poignant for me to come up with a funny memory, but I hope we continue to maintain contact and I will definitely keep following you on LAP. I’m glad you’re not disappearing completely.

    • Chowderhead

      That makes one of us! Thanks though. In one way it kinda sucks, but in every other way it doesn’t. I need to concentrate on other things. Period. And we’ll definitely keep in contact. I contacted you yesterday, didn’t I?! Maybe I will today too. And the next day too. I’ll still be around. We’ll chat.


  8. Ned's Blog

    Do you remember that time we tried out for the Olympic toboggan team in Salt Lake?!? And how, when they kicked us out, we formed our own two-man team wearing Nacho Libre outfits and riding a VW hub cap?!? Well, anyway, those were good times. And while I hate to see this blog ride off into the blog-o-sphere, I’m comforted to know I can always catch you in a Long Awkward Pause. Kind of like how people were looking at us when we crashed into Bob Costas.

    In all seriousness, you’ve done some brilliant stuff here. As long as it’s still continuing out there somewhere, I’m happy.

    Cheers to you.

    Oh, by the way, when are we meeting in Sochi?

    • Chowderhead

      Ned, yes! Yes, I remember all that like it was yesterday! The Bob Costas collision was perfect!

      Wait…no! No, I don’t remember any of this at all?! Was I drunk…?

      Thanks so much for the props. Seriously, this was so much fucking fun when it was fun. Congrats to you with the new book too, more importantly, and when I get some bucks together that I can spend, I’ll *try, anyways* to remember to pick up a copy. Feel free to hold that to me, because I really do think you’re funny. You’re one of those *obnoxious ‘real writer’ types…Let’s play around on Twitter in the meantime though, eh? I don’t use it enough, but I find it wildly entertaining and useful.

      I love going back in forth with you, so I hope to continue over on the other site and yours. It’s difficult to follow so many people, and I don’t really know a way to be efficient/effective about it. But I will drop when I can, cool? Yes. Right. On we go! I think Willy Wonka said that, if I’m not mistaken?

      Talk soon, Nedster \m/

      • Ned's Blog

        Crap, now I’m thinking it was someone else. How embarrassing…

        Anyway, I appreciate the kind words and am really glad you said what you did about trying to juggle visiting the blogs you follow. I go through periods where I feel really guilty about not being able to frequent everyone’s site on a regular basis. I try to catch up on weekends, but I love spending time with my family, too. Man, am I whining enough for you? Anyway, I was glad to see I’m not the only one struggling with that.

        And as for Twitter, I’ll look forward to it. I run hot and cold on it, but really do enjoy the challenge of trying to communicate in 140 characters or less, and still leave room for a photo of my cleavage…

        Take excellent care, Adam. It’s always glad to connecting with you.

      • Chowderhead

        It’s seriously tough, and I feel the same way about it. I always have. Sometimes I forget about people! I used to be better at it, but you start meeting so many people that it gets to the point where it’s just not possible to do anymore. Then you go and get all selective about it, people think you don’t like them anymore, start feeling guilty about only interacting with people that come by your own site, blah blah blah. Everybody eventually runs into the same dilemma. It’s the nature of the beast.

        Look forward to your boob pics, and same to you. You’re a cool fucker!

  9. sagedoyle

    Sorry to hear you’re going, but I completely understand. It’s why I’ve never regretted using a penname, and in the beginning, if I had used my real name, all of this would have freaked me out and I’d have quit. I’d never have lasted. Anyway, if you ever feel like writing something randomly on a different venue, feel free to guest post on my blog. The offer’s open indefinitely. Just send me an email, I’m around long term. Take care, and good luck with everything!

    • Chowderhead

      Thanks for the email invite, and for droppin’ by, brah! Was that the correct spelling that would indicate a Bostonian accent? Nevermind. I have my own weird accent dilemma to deal with…

      And thanks for the offer – I will definitely keep it in mind, because I still would like to pop in for a post on occasion. I’ll hit ya up eventually, promise!

      Later dude \m/

  10. RFL

    Respect. Word.
    In a nutshell, this is what I was trying to say yesterday, “As far as the reality of this whole blogging platform goes, it’s an imaginary world – a fantasy – and sometimes it’s easy to get caught up in that fantasy aspect of it.”
    I’m sad to see you take this blog down, but I will catch you on LAP, and if you want to collaborate in the future let me know.

    • Chowderhead

      Rachelle, stop putting me on the spot like this! 😉

      Don’t be sad. I’m keeping it up. I’ll definitely see ya around soon! Again, collabing is definitely a go – keep in touch via email whenever. Seriously.

      Later \m/

  11. The Cutter

    I obviously missed something, because I have no clue what the fallout of which you speak is. Anyway, I think you deserve a chance to say goodbye, and I’ll be sorry to see your blog go. For some reason, you seemed like one of the bloggers who I’d actually enjoy hanging out with in real life. I dunno, maybe it’s only because you wear your hat backwards and I do that too. But good travels and good luck.

    • Chowderhead

      I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing, Cutter? I’ll leave it at that, however.

      Thank you so fucking much for that. Seriously, thank you. I don’t think I’m a whole lot different in real life to be honest. Maybe I am. Who knows. Drop by LAP and keep in contact that way if you’d like. We don’t have a blogroll per se, so it’s difficult to remember to keep up with EVERYBODY. I’m trying. I don’t need to, but I’d like to be able to chat more with everyone.

      Maybe one day we will have a beer? That Blogger Interactive thing’s probably gonna be around for awhile. I have a wedding to deal with this Fall, so maybe in two years? Fuck. That’s a long time. Are you gonna still wanna have a beer then? Time will tell.

      Keep in Touch (Junior High Yearbook Autograph) \m/

  12. talesfromthemotherland

    I’m not sure i know what the fall out is, but I THINK I do. I was following one fallout; I blinked and it was all pulled down. That said, I found this post the first one I am really connecting with in a while. You and I have shared enough private emails that I hope you know, I like the “real you.” I wanted to support Chowderhead, but it wasn’t totally my schtick and I often felt out of my element here. Too edgy for soft me. 😉 This post touches me though. “You touch me like you know me!” (she said in a humorous tone). I have had some very challenging, and at times, painful interactions, when I find out that the on-line person I thought was a friend, is an acquaintance. You’re totally right here, Adam… we only know each other so much, here… there’s a lot of “the character I play on a blog” going down, and it’s hard for us mush balls who think that we’re all being real. We’re not. I try really hard to be, but then I lose myself, trying to fit in to a cool group or make the cut. I respect your decision and will check out your other blog… Honestly didn’t know you had it. I have a 2nd blog too, but it fairly private and I don’t advertise it much. I also don’t write on it enough. Tough to juggle! Unless you work in the circus. Good luck. You have my email, if you ever want to chat… for real. 😉 xo

    • Chowderhead

      Hey, D! Good to see ya, and yeah, I can totally understand what you’re saying. It is a little bit on the ‘not for some people’ side, and I think that’s just another reason why I don’t want to fuck with it anymore. Regardless, not that it really matters now, but you’ve ALWAYS been welcome here. This is the cool group. The coolest group. You know that. Come on…

      And I’m glad I touched you. Erm, well, ehh….you know. Not your leg or anything like that…ehh, oh boy…”we’re on the same page”

      I’ve been trying to put all this into words for months – literally – because there’s nothing funny about it. I hate to sound all fucking dramatic here, but I’m serious about all this, and it needed to be said. I think we all need to put some space between the fantasy and reality of it all. Step back and have a different perspective about it. I’m glad I was finally able to get it out because everybody, including me, needs to read this and be aware of it. At least I think so? But who the fuck am I? Another asshole with an opinion…

      I’ll send the email chat offer right back to ya. Anytime you’d like to chat, feel free to hit me up. I have one of those ‘smart phones’ now, so I can catch up with ‘business’ now while during times that I normally couldn’t before. Like when I’m on the shitter. Just a heads up. A good visual, eh?

      We’ll chat soon, D \m/

      • talesfromthemotherland

        Yes, I do think more of us need to read this, and this is well written and very powerful. It’s kind of you to say I fit in, but let’s be real: I don’t. You and I have shared some nice chat, and I get where you’re coming from here. But, I’m not that blogger that the “cool kids” invite over or read much. That’s ok. There’s no self-pitty in that; I’m very comfortable with who I am as a blogger and where I fit.

        I followed Chowderhead to support YOU and enjoyed the posts that I enjoyed. You’re a good “asshole” with a good opinion, for the record. I have thought a LOT about this topic too… and realized I need to check my emotions and expectations at the door and just be the blogger I am. I’ve thought of so many posts I might write about the topic, but you covered it well. Thanks!

        I think I have your email, but messed up my contacts awhile ago. Shoot me a quickie… yeah, read that however you want hot stuff… and I’ll confirm. 😉 When you have a chance that is… shitter, shower, walking to the store, drinking…

      • Chowderhead

        Again, yes, you do fit in. My philosophy has always been from day one, everybody’s welcome here. I don’t like cliques. They single people out. This has never been a clique. It’s a social media platform. Now, in real life, that’s different. I don’t want you anywhere near me. Dry humor alert. Seriously, that’s a problem though – one person defining who or what is ‘cool’. I think a lot of things, a lot of people, are cool. Is that weird? I don’t know? You’re accepted here because you’re a writer. I talk to lots of ‘mom bloggers’ – you think I give a fuck that our styles are different? Not in the least. Come one, come all.

        Keep that in mind, and thanks for supporting “me” – I think you’re a great writer, and you come off as a pretty decent gal. We’ll be in touch!

  13. ddupre315

    Understood, but I did enjoy the few rounds we went a few times. Great sarcastic wit and to think I was considering unfollowing LAP, this will keep me there. I think if I ever take my blog down I’ll do it in uber dramatic emo style, with a lot of flair….or just stop posting and disappear into the abyss. One of those.

    • Chowderhead

      Ah, yes! Fuck yes. We’ve had some pretty funny exchanges in the past, and I promise, it will definitely continue over at LAP. It’s the funnest part. Stop by on occasion! And I love the idea of the dramatic emo-style departure. I wasn’t sure what route to go; that one, or the David Bowie sign off. It was a tough call. I’m sure eyes are rolling right now like I’m trying to make this some big fucking dramatic ordeal. I am! It’s working!

      Whatever. Stop by the other site and drop a line soon, eh? Talk to ya, chick! \m/

  14. Tom Merriman

    Hey Adam! Look at me sounding all Americanish!
    I follow Long Awkward Pause but visit there even less than I visit here, although having said that I haven’t really visited anywhere for the past month or so properly. Anyway. Good to have ‘met’ you, and good to hear you’re not totally leaving the Blogosphere yet – your small corner of the internet has always been entertaining to read whenever I’ve popped by – but we must do what we feel is right, regardless. If it’s no fun, there’s no point doing it, is there?
    Good luck with LAP, and your writing – perhaps you could write the odd seasonal special here once or twice??? Just a suggestion. Good job I learned how to do the \m/ before you closed shop; this last sentence would have been terribly awkward if I hadn’t!
    See you around, Adam!

    • Chowderhead

      Hello, Mr. American!

      Start going there instead. It’s funnier, and cooler looking. I’ll make you a cup of coffee. We’ll smoke a hookah together or something…

      Glad to have met you too. And thanks for all the traffic. I’ve mentioned it before, but that list of bloggers page shows up in my stats a LOT. So thanks for that. And thanks for the props! It’s really been a lot of fun. I’m also not saying goodbye forever per se, but I need to step away from the vehicle for awhile. I can handle one post a month for now – I’ll probably come back and do this here at some point too.

      And lastly, congratulations. You’re an official Chowderhead now \m/

  15. lillianccc

    For the record, I’m glad you wrote this to give those of us who care a heads up. I’m obviously guilty of having become a very fleeting presence here but regardless, I’ve always respected and admired your writing. And like you said in reply to many people here, that’s what it is and should be about. The writing and the people who write. I completely agree with you about defining that (albeit blurry) line between what’s important to us (and hence can provide great writing fodder) and what’s personal. Whatever the fallout entailed, it clearly wasn’t a fun ride but it sounds like it gave you some perspective and a reality check, which we all need from time to time. I wish you nothing but the best and I’m really glad the writing thing has worked out well for you! For the first and last time, I’ll also give you this: \m/ (I did do that correctly, right?)

    • Chowderhead

      Are you gonna hate on me if I say that I forgot about you? See, this is part of it. I can’t keep up, and now I feel like a horse’s ass for having not talked to you in awhile. We’ve interacted quite a bit – especially early on – and I miss those days, seriously. That sounds so stupid and corny, but its truth. *headslap*

      You’re welcome, and thank you so much. I’m not leaving the world, I promise. I still love writing – just not this stuff – not here anymore. You’re an exceptional writer yourself. I will say, that the second FP article – the world’s longest story – was one of those highlights. That was really fun, and I remember some chick opening her purse in a bathroom stall at McDonalds and entering warp zone 5. Awesome.

      As far as the fallout goes, it’s everywhere. I’m sure you’ll bump into it at some point. I’d rather stay out of it all together. If that makes me a whatever, then I guess I’m whatever…

      I have you on my reading list, and I’ll pop over soon. Ok? Promise. \m/

      • lillianccc

        Don’t even worry about it dude, real life people are hard enough to keep up with as it is. Digital world? It’s like a blackhole… we just keep going, “Hi, nice to meet you!” and get sucked ever deeper into the hole. So in a way, I’m thankful real life has prevented me from getting too caught up in the blogosphere.

        Thank you for your compliments, it means a lot! Also, I definitely want to keep a weather eye out for your writings so hopefully I’ll remember to drop by LAP soon. Keep on rocking it!

      • Chowderhead

        Blackhole. Yes to this. Seriously, I always liked your writing. I think you deserve the press you’ve gotten. Keep rockin’ it too! We’ll talk soon after my four week vacation to Aruba. I mean the couch and mall. Later! \m/

  16. calahan

    While I’m sad to see Chowderhead taking a bow, I must admit that I am looking forward to maybe reading more of Adam. You have a lot of good ideas and your enthusiasm is unarguable, so your next phase can only be an even better one. I always have and will continue to look forward to your next post, wherever it’s posted.

    • Chowderhead

      I think an “I love you, man” is appropriate here. Seriously dude, thanks, and I feel the same way about your stuff. I’m so looking forward to something else. Long overdue. The idea of making money really intrigues me too. We’ll see where that goes.

      I like the idea of the Pause going off WordPress. That truly excites me most.

  17. anitadesignstudio

    This is one of your best blog posts.

    Have you ever seen Good Will Hunting? There’s a scene where Ben Affleck says to Matt Damon, that when he knocked on Matt’s door every morning to collect him for work that he secretly hoped and prayed that one morning he didn’t answer. That he’d left and gone to pastures new to realise his full potential…

    This isn’t the end, dude. This is just the fucking beginning.


    • Chowderhead

      It better be, because it took me a pretty fucking long time to write! Thank you.

      I have seen that movie and it’s a goodie, and good a reference there too. Beyond the beginning..


  18. El Guapo

    Ok, here’s my story:
    So I heard about this guy on the web, and most of what I heard was good. People I enjoyed and respected recommended checking out his site. The I came to this blog for the first time ever, and it was the night he signed off. HAHAHAH-


    Hello and goodbye. I’ll keep an eye out for you on …Pause.

  19. Maddie Cochere

    I said on my blog that you are one smart man, and it is on full display here. You’ve shared a lot of good, heartfelt advice today. I’m really glad I came here specifically to meet you, Adam. I’m proud to know you, and I’ll be following you at Long Awkward Pause.

    • Chowderhead

      Thanks, Maddie. Glad it makes sense to you. It’s like a reality check if anything. Maybe I’m paranoid. Probably not entirely..

      Also, that bet we made turned out to be a really good idea. That was fun! Thanks again! I’ll see you at LAP where we will continue our friendly banter there. I’ll be by soon too. Talk to ya!

  20. blatherbubbleblog

    Hello! I’ll look for you on LAP. I’ve bookmarked the page. Thank you for everything that you’ve done for me. You know that I’m always your friend and you know how to get in touch with me. Brightest Blessings

  21. benzeknees

    I’m very sorry to hear you are going to retire your blog. I was a follow a while back & for some reason I wandered away. I remember asking you about your \m/ symbol & you were kind enough to explain it to me (but now I’ve forgotten again). We had communicated on some other site recently & I was going to give you another chance, but before I could you have decided to retire. I do follow Long Awkward Pause, so hopefully I’ll see some of your writing there! Good luck with your new direction, I hope it’s everything you want it be!

    • Chowderhead

      I know, me too. I’m kinda bummed out about it, but I gotta step away from it for awhile and take care of other stuff. I recall our conversation too, actually. I think it was on the about page. That symbol represents the ‘rock hand’. I will see ya around, and thanks a lot for droppin’ by in the past. We’ll see you at the Pause. Later! \m/


    Sad that you won’t be doing your own blog but I already follow long awkward pause so that’s good. Great story and very true about information we share. Thank you Adam!!!


  23. Mary Gibbons

    Hey Adam! Haven’t read all of your posts, but the ones I have read were outstanding, as is this one. Always enjoyed reading your work! I’ll check out LAP for sure. Good luck, and never stop writing!

    Mary Gibbons

    • Chowderhead

      Thank you so much! I don’t know why the thought never crossed my mind until now, but it would have been pretty funny to interview you. If you’re ever up to it, I’ll keep it in mind for the future! I think it would be pretty funny. I’ll keep an eye out for you regardless, and I’m sure we’ll be in touch regardless. Talk to ya! \m/

  24. DaydreamsInWonderland

    Aww shucks. I just got here & you’re leavin’ on me? (Kidding) I totally understand. I’ll be following Maddie to go see you at LongAwkwardPause. In all seriousness, this a really deep, thoughtful post & I have a lot of respect for that.

  25. aaforringer

    You should try and walk a mile in those haters shoes. That way you are a mile away from them and they have to chase you with no shoes on. (stole that from a Jack Reacher novel)

    Vio Con Dios comrade.

  26. Fat Bottom Girl

    Now you run out on me, just when I follow you on Twitter?? WTF?? I totally feel you dude! I have no idea what the “fallout” was you’re referring to, but I understand where you’re coming from in regards to everything you’ve posted here. It was one of the reasons I chose to remain anonymous on my blog, even though I did post that one pic of me in costume.

    I guess in order to get my Adam fix I will have to read you on LAP now. Just know that you came, you saw, you rocked this shit!

    • Chowderhead

      Sorry chick. I got something else in the works that’ll be fun. I’ll make sure we connect soon.

      The fallout has to do with boundaries and cults. That’s all that’s important. And do yourself a favor:

      Do not let this blogging shit get personal on any level. Keep your identity the way it is, because as more of this shit filters down to me, and the more clarity I have about the whole picture now – the stuff that involves my real life – the sicker it makes me.

      I hope that you understand the message that I wrote here. It’s so fucking important. Thanks for always rockin’ it here with me. We go back quite a ways, and like I said, I’d like to continue somewhere else. I’ll make sure you get an invite soon.
      Talk to ya \m/

  27. Nicole Marie

    Rock on, Adam.

    While I’m sorry to hear you won’t be posting on CH anymore, I respect your decision, and I get it. And internet friends or not, you’re still my friend, and you’re awesome.

    I’ll be following along at LAP. \m/

  28. Jen and Tonic

    I catch up on my blogging and read this shit?! You’re breaking my heart!

    But in all seriousness, I get where you’re coming from. The internet gives us a false sense of security, and sometimes we learn the hard way that the security was just in our heads. People can be dangerous anywhere you go, but can become even more dangerous when they have the anonymity of the web to hide behind.

    I find it very ironic (and sad) that your best post here is the one saying goodbye. I’ll be sure to catch you at LAP!

    • Chowderhead

      Hey Jen, I’m not dead. I just need to take a break for a little while.

      Thanks for adding a perspective, and I’m really glad that we connected on here. You’re a great writer across the board, and you seem to be a pretty sweet person on top of it. Big congrats on your last post too – it was a good one. Chat me up whenever, otherwise I’ll bump into you somewhere around the blog-sphere. Later, chick. \m/

      P.S. I think you have my address, so technically that means I’m not anonymous. Please don’t send a hitman. Or at least give me heads up before I’m rolling around in the parking lot with two broken knees. I need them for mobility purposes.

  29. Katie

    What’s all this?! I’m glad you’re saying on LAP. You’ll be missed, bro, but I can totally understand everything you’re saying here. It’s been a wild ride. Looking forward to reading more of your stuff on LAP.

    • Chowderhead

      Hey, Katie! Thanks, I appreciate it. It’s too much work balancing the two. However, LAP is gonna be a great hangout soon. Total format change underway, so make sure you stop by a say what up! Check you later \m/

  30. TJLubrano

    ADAM!! \m/

    I’ve been living under a rock (aka moving boxes). Kid you not! I’m so late to join your retirement party. I totally respect your decisions and the world of blogging has crashed my world a few times. Maybe because I know I blog from the heart I automatically think others do the same. It’s an annoyance, really. I won’t ramble too much about this. More importantly, I’ve been following LAP, so I’m good for when I need my dose of humor.

    A memory with you? I’d say that one time you fooled me that you had a “moped”, now I’m not sure if you recall this haha. OR your reaction when you saw the little dragon. The move to my new place pre-occupied so much of my time that the tutorial just didn’t happen when I wanted to. So so sorry about that. You can still have the little painting if you want.

    I know where to find you! I obviously meant this in a non-creepy way. 🙂

    Keep on doing what feels right for you. \m/

    • Chowderhead


      No problem, and sorry that you have to move boxes. Moving boxes sucks and it’s boring. Thanks a lot for joining up with LAP! I’m not sure I’m completely done with the Chowderhead thing, because I still need a place to goof off a bit. Some time away was definitely in order, however. I feel a bit refreshed nowadays.

      And I recall this moped prank of mine haha. I’d like to own one – like the Ace and Harry from Dumb and Dumber \m/ I’d love to have that painting by the way – just a PDF file is fine – no need to mail it. But, if you’d still like to do that tutorial post, I think it would be a lot of fun. No worries about the timing – if it feels right, we’ll do it at some point. Sound good?

      Check ya later, and thanks for dropping by!

      • TJLubrano

        I can’t wait to settle in the new place as now I’m living in a Twilight Zone of some sorts and…well it’s not good.

        Also, you’re talking to me, Adam. A simple PDF is not enough, haha. And yes! I still love to do the tutorial post. I was all in the “oh my gosh I missed this post” mode that I forgot to check when you posted it. I’m glad you feel a bit more refreshed again. \m/

        Gooo for the moped! Hehe 🙂

        Talk to you soon!

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